Being The Best

My third child was recognized yesterday at school for being the only child in his grade to run 10 laps around the school track in 12 minutes (the equivalent of about 1.5 miles from what I understand). This happened late September. Apparently his PE coach made a big deal out of it in front of the entire school and said that in all his years of coaching, my son is the first child of that grade to have ever done that in the fall. Wow! Kind of cool to be the best at something, huh?

My second child was also given an award yesterday for being in the top five runners of her grade. I'm really proud of both of them. They have worked hard and are doing really well. And it's great that they're being recognized for their success. But you know who I'm really proud of? My oldest. He has worked really hard at running for several years and has never been as successful as these other two. But he hasn't been jealous or mean-spirited. In fact, he's been really supportive of both of his siblings and he cheers them on! He may not be as gifted in that area of his life as the other two, but to me, he has succeeded at something far more important. He has figured out how to be kind, loving, and supportive even when his hopes for success are superseded by someone other than himself. Even more remarkable in this case since the "other" is a younger sibling.

I think it has helped his self confidence to be recognized for something quite different. If he felt like a failure, he might not be so supportive. But his confidence has been boosted by him being recognized in October as the best reader in the school. And I think that has helped him to avoid any petty jealousy he might have felt in seeing his siblings be recognized for achievements that he has worked so hard for during the last few years.

I think we all want to feel that we are important and very often, we base our sense of self-importance on external valuations. How fast we can run, how much weight we can lift, how smart we are ... but none of these are really self-made abilities. We can nurture them, sure, but some people are naturally gifted with certain abilities that help them achieve such things and others aren't. So, can we really feel like we're better people because we achieve in something that is really facilitated by gifts given to us by God at birth? If God blessed me to be more intelligent than others, does that make me better than them? Can I really base my sense of self worth on something that had nothing to do with any choice of mine?

Perhaps far better is to base our sense of worth are the choices we make such as how we treat others. That is something that truly comes from our own will and power and is not dependent on God for His gifts. This is especially true when we don't FEEL like treating others kindly, but we do it anyway because it's the right thing to do. I'm grateful that my children are tasting the fruits of success and worldly praise, but I'm even more grateful that they're finding success in more important areas and I hope they can feel the praise of God for those good choices they're making in the way they treat others. I feel really blessed to have such great kids.