Bowling Night

We went bowling last night and had so much fun! I can't really explain why we had so much fun, but we all agreed it was one of the best nights we've had together in a while. We all cheered for each other, some of us danced and acted crazy, and one of the best parts was watching as my youngest would roll the ball down the aisle and cheer for herself as soon as the ball left her hands. It was so sweet!

The downside was getting beaten by my wife and oldest son. Here's the rundown:

Child #1: 104
Emily: 103
Brett: 102

No lie; those were the three highest scores. Oh well. I had a blast anyway. :)

Our Old House, Community Fun, and Old Books

Last week, on the very same day, we got an offer to buy our house and another offer to rent it. We're negotiating to sell and it looks like the deal's going to go through, so I'm really excited. Hopefully we'll have that off our backs in a few weeks.

We were down in the old community working on the house last Saturday and decided to stop by a community event we used to go to regularly. They had a fire truck, armored vehicles, and a tank that the kids could look at and for some of the vehicles, they were allowed to get inside and mess around. There were lots of booths, mostly full of things the kids don't care about. And there were some blow-up bounce houses and slides.

You know what's funny, though? We were there for a couple hours and the biggest draw for all of us was a used book sale going on in the courthouse. We spent more time there than anywhere else including the tank or the bounce houses. I'm pretty sure that makes us weird, but it makes me really happy that my kids all love books.

And even though I really love our new home ... I love our old home too. There are a lot of things I'll miss about it. But I'm also grateful to be where we are now.

Parade

Our community had a parade about a week ago and our kids had a blast. You can't tell from the picture, but trust me ...

Emily and I had a blast too. It was so fun watching them and it was cool to see some of what the community has to offer as various groups came parading by. Seeing the high school bands was one of the best parts. The high school we're slated for has a REALLY good band. That's cool because I played the trumpet in high school in a really high quality band and that was a great experience for me. I'd love to have my kids have that kind of experience if they're interested. I can see at least a couple of them wanting to do that.

Later that day, we went by an outdoor mall and walked around. There was a Borders there and we popped in to look at the clearance sale. I picked up a couple of Shakespeare's works for about $0.15 each. There were quite a few on the shelf, so I guess poor William isn't in as big a demand as he used to be. I think he's great. He's not quite my favorite author, but for 15 cents, I'll take a classic to have on the shelf.

The kids found other entertainment. Climbing on the statues at the mall was pretty fun too.

I love our new home.

Roller Skating

We went roller skating on Labor Day and had such a good time. My kids have only done it a couple of times before, but the three oldest picked it up again after a few minutes. The youngest had never done it before and she was so miserable at first. I was able to help her cheer up a bit, though, and she worked really hard at it.

Her salvation was a training device I'd never seen before. It was a PVC pipe assembly with wheels on the bottom. Check this out.

After that, she was golden. Look at the smile on her face! Within just a few minutes, she was skating so fast, I was a little nervous. That little girl has such drive. She wanted to be able to skate like her older siblings and she was awesome. We gave the trainer back after a while and she got out there by herself and she was fine after that.

I love holidays.

New Home Scorecard

Every time I think about it, I feel really grateful for our new home. Here's my latest scorecard:

• House: We loved our old house, but the new one is fantastic. I think it is just about perfect. I have told my wife several times that when we die, I want a house like this one in heaven.
• Neighborhood: Our subdivision has about 30 homes in it. I think we had about 8 or 10 neighbors come by in the first couple weeks to welcome us. Many of them brought gifts. Our kids have made friends with several of the neighbors and they love to ride bikes and play together. Our old neighborhood was great too, but most of the time we lived there, there were no children for our kids to play with.
• Community: Something about the area just feels like home. The community seems really well kept and people seem to really care about their surroundings. We went to a local parade recently and it was a blast!
• School: I've already blogged about this, but the school system we're in now is amazing!
• Commute: My commute is 5-10 minutes shorter each way. One of my favorite things is on the way home, I have several places where, if I see traffic is backed up, I can get off the main road and take alternate routes. Much easier on the nerves.
• Church: Our new ward is amazing! The church we attended in our old house had a lot of really wonderful people in it, but the culture was unhealthy for several reasons that I won't explain here because I don't want to offend anyone. I'm sure our new church has its problems, but I haven't seen too many yet. Maybe it's still the honeymoon stage, but I LOVE our new church family. There are so many fantastic people and the Spirit we feel together is so uplifting and sweet.
• Scouts: My son is in Cub Scouts and he was pretty unmotivated to attend the Scout program where we used to live. Since moving here, he has been so excited to go to every single meeting because it's so well organized, they do fun activities, and he feels like he's achieving some of the scouting goals.

So far, this new home has an A on all counts. Based on what I've seen so far, I'm ready to settle down for the rest of my life. That may be partly because the pain of moving is still fresh in my mind, but I've told several people that I want to die in that house. And the weird part is I think I'm serious about that.

Religion and Open-Mindedness

Sometimes it seems to me that religion is antithetical to open-mindedness. I've collected a few quotes below from religious leaders from my church and one from scripture that encourage open-mindedness. The sentiments are very refreshing.

"We should gather all the good and true principles in the world and treasure them up, or we shall not come out true Mormons." (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, p. 316)

"I want to say to my friends that we believe in all good. If you can find a truth in heaven, earth or hell, it belongs to our doctrine. We believe it; it is ours; we claim it." (Discourses of Brigham Young selected by John A. Widtsoe, p. 2)

 "... the most prominent difference in sentiment between the Latter Day Saints and sectarians was, that the latter were all circumscribed by some peculiar creed, which deprived its members of the privilege of believing anything not contained therein, whereas the Latter Day Saints have no creed, but are ready to believe all true principles that exist, as they are made manifest from time to time." (The Journal of Joseph: The Personal Diary of a Modern Prophet, p. 203)

"One of the grand fundamental principles of Mormonism is to receive truth. Let it come from where it may." (An American Prophet's Record:  The Diaries and Journals of Joseph Smith, p. 395)

"... study and learn and become acquainted with all good books, and with languages, tongues, and people." (D&C 90:15)

My experience with religiously-minded people has been a bit mixed. One thing I love about the church we've been attending since we moved is that the members of the church seem to generally be well educated, but are also open to new ideas.

Have I mentioned that I love our new home?

Feminism vs Femininity

A friend of mine recently posted about her reaction to the ending of a play version of The Little Mermaid. Apparently, in this version, Ariel kills Ursula and King Triton says Eric doesn't need his permission to marry his daughter. My friend expressed some uneasiness with this feminist indoctrination creeping into a play intended for children although the points did seem to be lost on her children.

What I thought was interesting was the reaction of some of the people who made comments on her post. There were four comments from people who felt strongly enough about feminism to state their disagreement with my friend's position. No supportive comments were made. That got me thinking enough to post about this.

I think it's great that women are more free right now than they have often been in history to pursue their lives in the way they think best. I think it's great that many women today feel empowered and able to choose what they want out of life. But although we have the feminist movement to thank in part for this progress toward freedom, there have been some undesirable side effects of the feminist program, in my opinion.

I think that feminism, taken to extreme, takes away some of what makes women feminine. My reaction to what my friend wrote about the play's ending was: "What the heck was Eric doing while Ariel was single-handedly saving the day?" That's great that Ariel was able to kill Ursula, but isn't it the man's job to protect his loved ones? What do we lose by rewriting the play such that Ariel is forced to take up the sword, trident, or whatever it was, and do the dirty work?

Somebody's got to do it, certainly, and if I'm not around and my family needs defending, I want my wife to feel empowered to do whatever it takes to protect them. But if I'm there, guess who's grabbing the gun. And that's not a misogynist act; it's a loving one. It's not an attempt to say that my wife is incapable of doing it, but rather, that it's my duty to do it. The truth is I am more capable of fighting than she is, but I don't take on the task because I seek to minimize or belittle her abilities. I do it because I love her. If someone's going to be on the front lines, I'd rather do it than have her put herself in danger for my sake.

Another reason I consider it my duty to do the dirty work is my belief that those kinds of acts are not exactly feminine. It seems to me that a woman loses something of her femininity by willfully engaging in violent acts. And by engaging in various other nonviolent acts in an attempt to show men that women are just as capable of doing everything men do, I think many women have lost much of their femininity. I think the extreme feminist agenda has taken away something of the incredible beauty of womanhood from many of the women who have bought into the feminist worldview.

Women don't need to be coddled, but there is something sweet about a man caring for his wife and doing things for her that she might be able to do herself, but doing them to show he cares for her. My wife likes to feel protected and she likes it when I'm at home because she feels more secure. I don't think she's a wimp because of that; I think she's a sweet woman who trusts me to take care of her.

There's a scene at the end of Disney's Tarzan where Tarzan and Jane are frolicking through the forest and the newbie is keeping up with the guy who's been 'snowboarding' on the treetops his whole life. In fact, she's doing just as well as he does. But somewhere in the middle of this romp, he catches her and she lets him hold her for a few seconds as if she were a little baby. Then they go back to their romp. I love that scene because I think it captures a little of what I think a healthy marriage relationship needs. Tarzan didn't feel threatened with Jane's snowboarding skills and she didn't feel the need to prove herself to him, but even though she became very capable, she wasn't afraid to be held. To me, it looked like an act of love not one of tyrannical dominion.

And about Triton disclaiming his authority as a father ... maybe it's old fashioned, but I think it's sweet when a man asks the father for permission to marry his daughter. That doesn't mean the father has the right to be a tyrant and abuse his authority. If he did - and I know that some do even without that quaint old custom - I might encourage the abused young couple to elope. But what's wrong with asking? Does it minimize a woman's freedom for her boyfriend to be respectful of her father's position?

I think the feminist movement has had some good come of it, but I'm afraid the net effect hasn't been very positive. I also believe, for example, that feminism has contributed to the breakdown of the family and although I didn't touch on it above, that connection makes the net effect extremely negative from my perspective.

After seeing the reaction to my friend's post, I think the beliefs I've outlined above may put me in the minority. Not that I care what others think in the sense that their beliefs don't threaten my beliefs or my feeling of self worth ... but I am curious about the prevailing sentiments. So what do you think of feminism? And don't be shy; I really would like to know. Even if you disagree with me. Especially if you disagree.